Naír

I’m midly baffled by all the people that said Vanitas has become unwatchable after episode 3. (I come from the manga) And it’s your right!! Nothing wrong, it just confuses me bc, like.

The story and charas are so interesting, and just bc someone acts in a way you don’t like you stop watching? (I know for some poeple it’s more complicated, and like, noncon kissing being a hard no is understable) But what does that have to do with your like of the story? I mean, I understand stopping when you watch/read something bc the charas-plot is stupid and not engaging, but when it’s all the contrary… Does everything wrong need to be blatanly signaled and condened by the charas and narrative for your pace of mind? (not accusative, just curious. there’s levels and shadows of gray to this stuff of course)

Of course there’s stuff you may not agree with or like, (or be repulsed by and then you exercise your right to nope out) but when it’s interesting I just keep reading bc who knows what’s in the future and I can separate my feels on “i love reading this” vs “that would be fucked up in reality, let’s analise why it appears here” really easily as long as i’m absorved by the story.

today i’ve realised there are people with legitimate critics of the throne of glass and acotar series by sarah j maas. it’s not that i love the books, because i stopped reading acotar after the second (bored, honestly) and tog after the… fourth? i got to the part where aelin and rowan come back to adarlan and people start battling each other and there is like, a ton of ice burying a castle at some point. i was also reading because of obligation and then i forgot even the books existed because the story in the last two had gone so wild i was like wtf i don’t care for this, i don’t know who the characters are anymore lol. and the only romance i really shipped was sam-aelin because i loved the prequels despite its faults you know? (it was more than a bit fucked up but these were two very fucked up kids who didn’t even have time to truly start healing ;_;) so realising that there are a lot more of faults than just doing whatever with the magic and such a poor job of characterising the fae, she also upon a bit of close examination (i started reading this series when i was like 13 and only throne of glass + prequels were published, i was just enjoying it and not thinking much about what i was reading) had a lot of other, more serious issues in her books was like woa. (poc ausence that i can’t relate very much but it’s very glaring, feminism issues, lgtb+ treatment etc) because i feel very much they contributed on making her characters feel alien for me and i never was on the same page with a lot of them and it just. it felt very awkward to keep reading those books once i also grew out of them. and look i’m 19 into 20 this year, it’s not like i’m all that older than the heroines but they feel so. fake? very much trying hard to tick the correct boxes, and sometime you can feel with them but other times it’s just artificial. i’ll say than even when i was reading for the first time i didn’t like chaol romance with celaena because it felt so much like the man who wants to make the woman stay in home with him, for him, it was so so weird watching celaena fall for him when he was like criticising her without looking where they were living and how she got there in the first place. (she wanted so very badly to be happy egh) when it ended wrong and he was such an asshole in the fourth book to her it wasn’t surprising; he seemed to me like that kind of man since the start. you’re no longer with me, i can’t control you anymore, i don’t understand you; you’re a bitch and everything is your fault. look i guess he got better in the rest of the books but that’s the image that stayed with me after all this time. another thing: celaena weird hidden princess hidden fae hidden destiny thing. i was like, what?! the first time i thought it was pretty cool but even before the third book was released i was already disenchanted with the idea. it started my indifference towards the saga that’s for sure. i wasn’t sure of the reason that was necessary? it killed a lot of my own assumptions and the fact that she was a lost princess all along and not a nobody who got where she was simply by coincidences or well a bit of destiny too, but a princess…. and a fae too? talk about overfill, and the fact that fae are so powerful but she couldn’t wouldn’t? (i don’t remember if she was like blocked by magic or just psychologically blocked) transform felt like the narrative was saying all the bad things happened to her because she didn’t defend herself well enough which is such bullshit- it’s not your fault when people are abusive and just like, evil. elena was guilt tripping her in acting, yeah that’s what it feels like.and well. rowan and maeve and all that felt very unnecessary, like. i started hating both of them and then a bit meh with rowan but the romantic development caught me by surprise and i was like, why why why. they could have been friends. i was ready and hoping they’d be friends. why romance so soon? it feet so forced, just so that aelin could have a hot guy again and she could heal his manpain. brrr. creepy.

other minor things (for me, like, these are the things i disliked while reading them there are lots of people talking better about why these books are not very good ones) these time concerning both acotar and tog. the fae. just. at the start in acotar at least they seem very fae-like. sjm seemed willing to do them more justice than in tog  where she directly just forgets about it. but just in book one, the nearer you are to the end the more they seem like superpowered elfs. not fae. but just, she took a look to the aesthetic of tolkien took a bit of the fae and their legends and then just did whatever she wanted (which like, she is justified in doing because well, fanfiction is also full of things like that and nobody is there policing the mythos of the story) and it clashes so badly. it left with the impression she didn’t know if she wanted flashy magic or the more labyrinthic and thought out use of magic in fae stories. holly black managed it well, as did melissa marr and they experimented and did  a bit of whatever to mesh it in urban fantasy (well holly black isn’t exactly urban but you know it takes place in the modern world) (and melissa did more of whatever she wanted and includes also more flashy magic) (and they aren’t perfect either but you know, they were better written it feels) but they still feel very fae-like? more alien in the good sense, because they’re not human. instead in acotar and tog they were like humans with superpowers and super beauty even more so in tog where even the bad guys were so, like. stupid? human stupid? and there were demons, the adarlan’s king was summoning and possessed by them xD i don’t know it didn’t felt epic or fairy-tale like but just another fantasy about a king reclaiming his kingdom and derroquing the evil along the way, just with lots of angst because teenagers girl and women. 

plus the romance in acotar… eh. i felt deceived when rhysand was revealed to be like, the dream boyfriend for the audience and feyre. i thought they had like chemistry and i was at the start a bit like, oh he is the second love interest which is super interesting and has deeps but is also like dark and wicked and doesn’t end with her because he encourages her to be too much herself. you know the type xD (although recently the tendency is in reverse which good lol) it was interesting what they did with tamlin (abusive boyfriend i really didn’t need to see in a book hello, are you here to teach us ignorant girls what to watch for when in search of a boyfriend?) but it also took me for surprise, and the fact that well. tamlin was so powerful and feyre only could only runaway with the help of rhysand who then revealed that city of dreams and that the court of nightmares was a facade and only a little part of his territory felt cheap lmao. tamlin can go eat shitcakes, but i felt his villainy was sudden, if plausible given what we knew of his personality. only you know, for me it felt like it happened because it was a lesson for the audience and feyre. a bit fake. rhysand being so good after all: feels a bit fake, again. i could connect with feyre/rhysand better than celaena ships but it still left a weird taste in my mouth reading about them you know? same with the other pairings of the book. why everybody have to have a boy-girlfriend? grr.  

overall i think that in sarah j maas books there is a preachy feel. like she wants to tell things to the audience and uses her characters, and instead the characters feel like puppets for ideas instead of people. hollow. they do things by rote, and they pass the time being very badass but also very domestic because i can be feminine and masculine obvs lol.  it doesn’t make the readers close to the characters but the characters feel like poster-kids for different issues lol. maybe i’m a bit hard on them? EDIT: (au contraire, seems i’ve been too kind lmao) but it’s what i feel and this is tumblr. be kind to yourself and each other.

EDIT: wow. reading other posts that treat in more profundity the mess that are sjm books… i can’t believe how much i’ve forgotten. creeepy, really. knew there was a reason i was shocked when rhysand was presented as the paragon of a boyfriend; i’ve just remembered, reading a very shocking post) all the shit things he does at the end of book 1. grr. between other issues. it seems the vibe i was getting of punishing or making the woman guilty of the shittiness of others and their societies is a trend. grrr again. seems like i was subconsciously noticing something wrong and jumped off the wagon lmao

Sarazanmai is an anime directed by Kunihiko Ikuhara, most known author of Mawaru Penguindrum, Utena and Yuri Kuma. He is known for his use of symbolism and metaphor and he has tacked problems to Japanese society in his anime. In Sarazanmai he mostly talks about people connections to others and how these are what allow us to exist. This isn’t new; but I think his approach beyond using Kappa and strafalary transformations is of interest to the theme of my class. He uses simlies with wifi and technology to talk about the connections we have with people. Here is the summary of the anime:

Asakusa.

Kazuki Yasaka, Toi Kuji, and Enta Jinai are second-year middle school students. They meet a mysterious being that looks just like a kappa named Keppi who steals the shirikodama (magical ball hidden inside the butts of people that kappa wish to steal) from each of the boys thus forcing them to transform into kappa.

Keppi tells the three boys, ‘if you want to change back, then it can be done, but you have to connect in ‘a certain way’ and bring me the shirikodama from zombies.’ The three boys then link up, but can they steal the shirikodama from zombies?! At the same time, Rei Niiboshi and Maku Akutsu are working to make something happen at the police station they work at.

It doesn’t tell us much for this is an anime which is better where you go blind to watch. However it tells us enough about the three protags, and with a few spoilers I can talk about the subject so. Here are the different cases in which Sarazanmai uses technology and internet to comment about human connection:

1. Mobile phones are prominent through the course of the anime. This is rare although less so with each year that pass. Usually in anime and manga phones and computers are used in scientific settings because they can prevent many of the old ways of causing problems and miscomunication between characters, making necessary for the author to innovate new ways of moving the plot. People doesn’t really bother though. Here they introduce us to the characters and they serve as proxys through which connection happens. Only the use of technology is ambivalent. Sarazanmai tells us that technology can help us strength those connections, seek help, etc, but that they are also a medium through which is easy to lie and create fake connections - Kazuki storyline with his little brother exemplifies this. Kazuki is scared of being close to his brother because he feels guilty of having caused him his disability (or so he thinks), and so he avoids him but talks with him crossdressed as his brother favourite idol to maintain his connection and keep him happy. Of course, the lie is ultimately discovered and Kazuki learns that is best to connect as himself and not through pretensions because they hurt everybody in the end. 

2. The use of an Amazon copycat company - Kappazon - to signify the lair of the villain. The appearance of the Kappazon boxes mark the first episode (and its miniboss) and they continue to appear to signal secrets or desires through Sarazanmai. You see, the bad otters which own Kappazon seek to domine the world through their absorption of desires and the elimination of love. In the subterranean where their base lays, people are put into boxes and classified on their utility: if they are labelled with love they are destroyed and if they are labelled with desire they die, but before their shirikodama (the ball in the ass signifying desire. subtle is not sarazanmai) is corrupted and a zombie is created. These zombies rob everybody in the city of the things that symbolise their own lost desires and is the job of our trio protagonist to extract the bad shirikodama and purifying it. I think we can see here a comment on the inhumane nature of the process in which Amazon and other grand corporations search to use our desires to their own ends, vilifying us for it and making us forget the nature of true connection. At the end, the Zombies in Sarazanmai searched for connection but they were lost and the grand machine of the otters and kappazon made use of it. The dark side of trying to connect under the lenses of the modern world.

3. When Kazuki, Enta and Tooi have to link to purify the shirikodama in their kappa forms (and wow isn’t this a crazy phrase xD) a little symbol in for of a wifi label appears over their heads. When it’s at the full bars, which indicates excellent internet, they fuse their memories and all of them see the memories of the desire that formed the Zombie plus the memories of the who took the lead in the shirikodama extraction. This person has to reveal his worst secrets for the extraction to work and allow the other two whether he likes it or not, for the shirikodama be purified. Besides the wifi symbol being a good shorthand for today’s anime fans, it also makes clear the invasive nature of the link akin to the net. When you share something, when you use internet you expose yourself to the whole of it, no matter if you want or not. For connection to exist you have to reveal yourself and be vulnerable, and our wifi exemplifies the double anonymity and oversharing process that happens when we engage with each other online.

4. When a Zombie is defeated (their shirikodama-desires erased) their whole former persona disappears from the memory of everybody who once knew them. And Sarazanmai show us this by the complete erasure of their digital persona; their phone numbers disappear, their images is eliminated from photos and everybody lives on. It shows quite blatantly that if you have not a phone and a social net profile you don’t exist. People can’t contact you, you can’t get information and life is like you were a ghost; at least in the “developed” world. As the circle below where the “soul” of the zombie disappears: no begining, no end, no connection.

There are more cases of technology but they aren’t as prominent and the whole anime talks about human nature and the connections that surround us so we could stay here all day talking and writing and I’m sure we could find more interesting things. As it is, I’ll finish this saying that Sarazanami does good use of the imaginary that surround us constantly and although Japan benefits more of a critic of the social structures given their people lack of aperture towards strangers, I think every of us can find plenty of interesting things in this anime. It talks to the youngs of today (me included lmao) and finds lacking a big part of what structures our lives without trying to condemn everything modern. Don’t forget to be human you have to accept the pain and the love and the desire. Don’t let others negate your self because it’s easier to follow the lead.

PD: THIS WAS FOR AN UNI HOMEWORK
 

well this was it. i’m happy to have exorcised this idea at last xD if someone wants to contribute or write something based on this, go on. i’d like to read your thoughts. (and really kc fandom is so dead ;_; this was the only one of riordan books that made write fanfic. horrible written oneshots of jonsu and people being amazing in the nome of brooklyn but yeah.)

Resuming my journey these last years: I’m a super recent fan of Star Wars, I only started liking the franchise when Rogue One came out. I loved it and I decided to give a chance to TFA, and all of the previous films. I rather liked the prequels, and I think they are better than the originals; at least I liked them more. (My mother btw agrees with me. She really liked the lore and worldbuilding and all the mythology and Jedi philosophy there, and how Anakin is affected by it in his descent to the dark side. More interesting than the adventure/action and a bit outdated romance of the originals.) 

When I watched TFA after all of the previous movies (again, the first time I was mehmeh about the movie without proper backstory) I was hooked. I felt like the sequel trilogy was mine, my favourite, and it was because of Rey and Kylo Ren. I sensed a truly intriguing enemies dynamic, maybe some potential for romantic angst? And when I watched TLJ, woa. My first time watching a SW film (RO doesn’t really count, it’s outside the main continuity, although it’s like second or third in my SW movie list) at the cinema and I loved it. I couldn’t believe how much I was enjoying, how much better than TFA it was, with the lore the force connection… Even CantoBight and Poe’s arc was somewhat interesting. And the symbolism… It felt like the mangas/animes I love, complex and interesting and conflicted. All the themes about reconciling the old and the new were perfect. And of course, Rey and Kylo/Ben relationship was OwO

TROS is bad because it didn’t make me feel anything. I confess I was a bit spoiled by tumblr. I knew Ben was gonna die, that the Palpatine thing with Rey was… not good, and that Poe-Finn-Rose papers in the movie weren’t good. My mother didn’t know any of this. I tell this because when you know some of the things that are going to happen, it may cheapen the experience but nope. She and I had the same reactions to the movie. A big grand what???? are they really doing this??? why is this happening??? from where did all the people come(you know all of the FO soldiers and officers and all those allies at the end and those weirdos with Palpatine acting as a choir)??? WTF. When people were dying or when our heroes were winning, it didn’t matter because it was the same. Things were happening but they weren’t well done or something because they felt pointless a lot of the time or ooc or disconnected emotionally from the audience. To the point that I (reylo, if you hadn’t noticed my former hints about what made me pay attention to the sequels) didn’t care about Ben and Rey scenes because they felt absurd. I mean, I noticed the connection and the obsession and at the start, I was, oh they could do something interesting out of this, but lol nope. It felt repetitive, and when Kylo started talking about Rey being Palpatine’s granddaughter ugh. Like it destroyed a big part of TLJ. 

The fight against Palpatine was absurd. They are this super powerful and young and not seen in centuries dyad-duo-pair (in Spain I think they called it “el poder de dos”) and Palpatine fucking sucks their power and throws Ben out of a cliff and then Rey has to kill Palpatine alone and dies? and then Ben revives her and also dies? my mother and i were like, whatever it doesn’t matter it’s all absurd. same for all the drama of poe and finn. (btw finn in love with rey, really??? i thought we had buried that in TLJ??? for good???) it was funny at the end though, because my mother was “oh now poe and finn should kiss” and i told her, “well a lot of the fandom also think so” and then rey appeared and the three hugged and she was “well now there is a threesome” and I told her, “well there is also a big part of the fandom who ships those three” and we were laughing silently. The end in tatooine was blegh. by then we weren’t even really paying attention. Rey Skywalker was met with this declaration “maybe if they had let Ben live she could have that last name and future skywalker babies to continue the legacy” which was more sardonic than anything for my part, because the movie was so bad that Ben living would have been just another slightly better meh. It was bad either way by then.

So this is all. I’m sad that this trilogy I had high hopes for has ended so badly. Like my mother said it before me: this was another season 8 of game of thrones and wow. So true. Now I’ll go to AO3 searching for good canon divergence and fix-it fics. This has been my vent. 

Because the beauty and pain of life are so, so, melancholic and hopeful. I left the cinema crying and smiling and amazed and sad and I keep remembering in random moments how wonderful it was and how much I loved Let’s Hurt Tonight by One Republic as its end song. I went with expectations that were very much met and beyond. The subtle magic of the ordinary and that final scene… wow. How it treats tragedy as well, and people recovering from it but never diminishes the pain it causes, too. Everything.

CALL ME BY YOUR NAME

I swear  I’m not trying to be the typical tumblr fan. This was released in my cinema, like half a year after its original date in other countries? And in a special session of European cinema only once. I went with one of my best friends, and wow. I know it’s not perfect, but the impact it had, the visuals and their beauty, that feeling at the end of devastation and hope. I wanted to read the book and I couldn’t because the whole weekend after I watched the movie I was in a daze and then it was too painful and everytime I remember it… I have the epub but I’ve still not gathered the will to read it. Not that I think I want. Curiously, I haven’t read fanfic for this one and I don’t want to, you know? I think is good as it is. Now if I could know why it felt like such a punch in the gut… (why you so relatable elio?)

BRAVE & MOANA

Now I need to talk a bit about my two favourite Disney’s princess movies ever: Brave and Moana. Brave talked to me in such a way… when I watched it with my mom in my home, after the first time in cinema with my aunt I felt a great connection with her. My mum and I are very close, and we understand each other better than Merida and Elinor but mother-daughter moments, family love and remembrance of the past and magic made it a combination impossible to forget.

Moana was wonderful for me personally. I’ve always wanted to go, to go find my way and write and live in other countries and explore myself and by self and if I can, to help my family and other people with my actions. She is for me the most relatable disney princess, and I didn’t know how I needed a princess like her until I went to the cinema that day. 

MAMMA MIA 1 & 2

I don’t know how many times I’ve rewatched Mamma Mia. First when I was 8 yrs old with of my mother’s side of the family in a birthday (I don’t remember whose)so since then I’ve always linked these movies to my family and my mom. After that day I’d watch it again and again on DVD. Part of that was that I didn’t have internet nor a laptop at home yet, but even more so was how I really loved its unabashed optimist and funny tone while having a lot of (good) feelings involved too. The characters, the songs, the isles and the greek weather so much like the one in my side of the Mediterranean sea… Pure good vibes. The second part was much of the same, but with more feelings and tears and I love it as much as the first one. The exception which confirms the rule. And I cried in the two films which seems to be my requirement in this list XD 

And well, this is the end. These are the movies that right now have impacted me the most. I mean I have a lot of others which I absolutely love, but if you were to ask me which impacted the most after watching them and have lasted in my memory… These 6 would be the ones. Another day I’ll do one list with those other movies but for now… Shoutout to Kimi no Na wa which I’ve seen thrice and every time I like it more and more although at first, I was like: oh, good in a lukewarm way. I’ve always like your soundtrack though. ;P (Now I know the error of my old ways. Also Makia and whatever your name in English is for destroying me and my mom emotionally a Sunday one month ago. I didn’t really like you that much but I recognize how amazing you are)

There is mainly one reason for this: the anime I hoped C&T to be isn’t anywhere near the current one. You see, before I watched episode 1, with only the trailers I thought: oh, this will be an anime about the trials these two girls need to afront to bring back music and feelings in a world of only technology. Even after watching ep1 I somehow retained this idea, because analogic music seemed almost forbidden. But although you could argue that this theme of bringing back the old good music still stands, the anime centres much more in the motions of a typical story of going famous. The emotional centre of the story that I thought would be so prominent is overshadowed by all of the weird characters that form part of the industry these two girls are trying to enter. There is nothing much of that subversive element I thought the story would bring, and instead is a classic anime story of the chosen one, just with music instead of fights. I still cannot swallow that weird ultra non-funny comedy, and all of the things that happen to the girls read like cheap drama to me. 

Even with the relationship between the girls themselves, which I thought would be more… something, I don’t know, I feel it lacks development. I totally liked that first two episodes but going on the rest I feel cold. The last two chapters tried bringing a bit of drama with Cybelle, and Tuesday being kidnapped back for her family, but meh. I don’t connect with any of that, except for Carole there at the end crying for Tuesday and even then I was: Wait, wait, why it seems like, so fake to me? Their relationship… hasn’t evolved much since that ep1, has it?

All this said: I find the anime boring and typical, with interesting worldbuilding that nonetheless has failed me in investing in the story. For example, Tao that cold asshole more or less exemplifies that original idea I had of the anime, so the little views we have of his head still interest me. Angela in the other hand, falls flat for me, although the more we see of her mama the more I wish to know more. Another one: Carole struggle to live all alone, and her feelings and her piano are also things I’m interested in, but that fails because I feel like she and Tuesday are…. very much like what two naïves 16-17 teens would be trying to make fame. 

(It feels unnecessary is what I’m trying to say. All the music and music opinions sound fake, and except for a few moments everything is very boring and predictable.)

So I think is a well-done anime, but with a completely different focus of what I expected, and with characters I am simply indifferent towards. For other people, it is maybe their anime of the year but for me… I really wanted to like this anime, but it is nowhere near Sarazanmai or Fruits Basket for me in terms of feelings and enjoyment. 

This is all I wanted to say.

PD: I really didn’t like how it makes fun of different or weird people too. It has more than a few unfortunate moments because of this.

Original post: https://alnair-tair.tumblr.com/post/185884496927/on-carole-tuesday-why-ive-dropped-it